A year ago yesterday I proudly wore my blue and gold jacket for the very last time as a member. It was a life changing event for me. My last FFA event, more than even graduation, made me realize that high school was coming to an end and I had to give up the very things that kept me going. The only thing that kept me from being completely depressed that night was the promise of the next day.
The next day, for the first time in my entire life, my mother let me skip school. And apparently she had briefly lost her mind, because she let me drive not only a few hours, but 8 hours. 452 miles to be exact. All the way from little ole Krum to Eagle Pass, TX. Yep, the border of Mexico. Right across from Piedres Negras. As in, you have to go through a Border Control checkpoint to leave EP.
I went with my best friend by my side. Once we got to Eagle Pass, we went to Uvalde to watch Randy Rogers, and started the absolute best weekend of my life. I may not speak to the people I spent it with anymore, but I will never forget how happy I was.
So much has changed since then. I feel like a completely different person. But I feel like I could also be the same exact person that I was. I can't pinpoint it exactly, but something has changed inside of me. I'm a little more broken. I'm a little more complete. I'm smarter, yet I still don't know enough. I've achieved some of my dreams, but still making new ones. I've grown as a person, but I feel smaller. But I'm still Shelby. I'm still the same small town girl who never fails to be anything but myself.